Chapter 1
by Luke Swift
I’m going to do a 200-mile one-day gravel race on my bicycle next June. Between now and then I’m going to ramble on about it. A little TMI and TL:DR mixed with tangents and obscure references. Sometimes w/ references. _____________________________________ Two years to get to Emporia Kansas:
Since 2006, the Unbound gravel race in Emporia Kansas has been the "World's Premiere Gravel Grinder". (Legen 2017). In the summer of 1992, fifteen years earlier, I stepped onto the campus of Emporia State University with the intention of studying how local songbird populations are affected by brood parasitism by Brown-headed Cowbirds. Coincidently, Dr. Brown (who is not brown-headed) was directing the research. I assumed brood parasitism was the most exciting thing that EVER happened in the middle of Kansas; Or would EVER happen again. Of course this was naive because the greatest gravel race EVER would eventually emerge in the middle of Kansas. Even more interesting is that around 10,000 yrs earlier, inbound human interlopers sauntered into the area and initiated the “Pleistocene overkill”. An early tiktok eating challenge that resulted in the extinction of all large ice-age mammals including mammoths, camels, ground sloths and horses. (Gille 1999) As described by Monty Python’s historical documentary: “And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths, and carp and anchovies, and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit-bats and large chu…” (Cleese 1975) I’ll skip a bit to avoid digressing.
On January 27th of 2020, 28 years after my only other trip to emporia, I found out I “won” the registration lottery and was invited to race what was called the Dirty Kanza 200 at that time. A few weeks later, I bought a 7yr old baby-blue Giant TCX to race MonsterCX with the intention of using it to tackle the flinty backroads around the middle of Kansas. (Where Sid the sloth and Ellie the mammoth once roamed, before satiating my species insatiable appetite for extinction (Wilson, 2002)).
My race notes that year were brief: MCX: 3rd of 117 in 50+ AARP greybeards field. Official Time: 2:55:27 Felt good for two hours and seven minutes, then a bobble through a corner and lightning cramps popped me off the back of the group of ten. Solo’d the last 45min. First ride on the Giant TCX. Light & whippy Tires: Maxxis Ramblers 40s. Solid. No flats. Big Tiki group of friends representing DC Made the ride extra fun. A long weekend in RVA with the Durham peeps is a yearly tradition to look forward to. Next up, Dirty Kanza 2020!!!
That was naive. Two years, and a worldwide epidemic later, DK200 is now rebranded as Garmin Unbound. Once again, I lined up for MonsterCX (last weekend) on the same set of ramblers 40s but on a new cobalt-blue whip #Cobaltbikes and a new cycling team. #DTRacing. I’ll post an updated version of the MCX race report next and periodic thoughts on training for a 200 mile gravel race.
References: Cleese, John et al. Monty Python and the Holy Grail. (1975) Gille, Frank H. ed. Encyclopedia of Kansas Indians Tribes, Nations and People of the Plains (1999) Legan, Nick (20 December 2017). Gravel Cycling: The Complete Guide to Gravel Racing and Adventure Bikepacking. VeloPress. ISBN 978-1-937716-98-1. Wilson, Michael J. Ice Age (2002).
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